You Belong With Me?

She's cute and mighty popular and won't ever struggle to pay her electricity bill, but doesn't Taylor Swift remind you of Kathy Bates in Misery?

The song says it all: it's the story of a teenaged girl infatuated with a guy who bypassed her for a better model.

Taylor's the only one who gets his humour.
Taylor's the only one who understands him.
Taylor's the only one who really knows what he wants - Taylor.

Nothing stalkerish about that.

Is she planning to abduct this dude and chain him up at her place?
To save his life, will he confess that he hates his cheerleader girlfriend with the heels and short skirts?
Does the dude end up with broken legs after he tries to escape?

We understand that all relationships are fundamentally sado-masochist in nature - someone has the power, and the other likes it.

But some people just take it a little too far.





Bottoms Up, Country Musicians.

Tailgating in Your Dining Room for Super Bowl Sunday

Super Bowl Sunday is only a few days after my birthday so for the past couple of years, I've had a Super Bowl Sunday Birthday Party.

What fun!

Lots of friends come over an hour before the game begins. We have time to catch up and eat some food. My version of tail-gating is to put a lot of plates on the dining room table, buffet style. That way everyone can fill up a plate before the kick off and return for refills during the game.

After the game, we have dessert (and the birthday cake with candles!), coffee and tea.

What to serve

Picnic food is perfect for watching the game: rosemary fried chicken, egg salad with grilled vegetables and bacon, lobster salad, carrot salad with lemon soaked golden raisins, green salad, oven roasted beets tossed in seasoned olive oil, chicken wings, Caesar salad with grilled shrimp, baked parsley-garlic chicken breasts, sage and shallot stuffed porchetta, and brown sugar pork ribs.

And for desserts, we'll have some choices: handmade chocolates, apple pie with candied ginger crust, ice creams, banana chocolate chip-walnut cake, vanilla custard, dried fruit compote and fresh fruit (Valencia orange wedges and Fuji apples).

My favorite


I love chicken wings. Deep southern fried wings with a light, seasoned flour dusting or marinated and roasted with Korean (kimchi) or Vietnamese (nouc cham) spices.

For this Super Bowl Sunday, I'm making the Nuoc Cham Gung version. Spicy, sweet, moist and delicious. They are a crowd pleaser.

Spicy Sweet Ginger-Garlic Chicken Wings

Serves 4 as an entrée or 8 as an appetizer

Ingredients

2 pounds chicken wings, washed, disjointed, wing tips discarded or reserved and used to make stock

½ cup white sugar

½ cup warm water

¼ cup fish sauce--preferably a light caramel colored brand

¼ cup white vinegar

2 teaspoons fresh lime juice

4 cloves garlic minced

1 dried Chinese Szechuan pepper, stem removed, seeds and skin minced

3 tablespoons or 3” ginger, peeled, minced

2 tablespoons brown sugar, to taste

Directions

1.       In a large non-reactive bowl, dissolve the white sugar in warm water. Add the other ingredients, stir to mix well and add the chicken wings. Transfer to a sealable plastic bag and refrigerate one hour or, preferably, overnight.

2.       Remove the wings and transfer the marinade to a small saucepan, adding the brown sugar. Stir to dissolve and reduce by a half or, if you want a thicker glaze, by two-thirds over a medium flame to create a glaze that should have a good balance of sweetness and heat. Taste and adjust for more sweetness if desired by adding another tablespoon of brown sugar.

3.      The wings can either be grilled on a barbecue or baked in a 350 F oven on a rack on a baking sheet lined with aluminum foil for easy clean up. Turn every ten minutes. Cook until tender, about 30 minutes.

4.       Place the wings on a large plate of Asian noodles, steamed rice, or shredded lettuce. Just before serving, pour the hot glaze over the top.

I Used to Make Gnocchi All the Time

I used to make gnocchi all the time. Like twice a week. I don't know why, but I fell out of the habit. Feeling a twinge of nostalgia, when H-bomb needed dinner and we had nothing prepared, I made a batch. Gnocchi are an under-appreciated pasta, probably because when they're made badly they're heavy and tough

I've been adding apples to things recently, mostly because I'll see an apple sitting there while I'm making something and think, whatever, maybe that would be good with apple. When I decided to make gnocchi, I noticed an apple sitting there, and nature took its course.

Conventionally, potato gnocchi are made from cold cooked potato, flour and eggs. This requires the foresight to have cooked and cooled a potato in advance, something I do not have. I typically peel and dice the potatoes, boil them and shock them in cold water to make the temperature manageable. If the potato hits the flour and egg while the starch is still hot, the whole mass becomes elastic and gluey and no fun to work with or eat. For this batch, I diced the apple and added it to the potato prior to boiling. On a whim, instead of water I decided to boil the potato and apple in vegetable stock with a pinch of saffron. I love the way saffron brightens otherwise starchy foods and thought it might make the gnocchi a little more interesting on their own.

When the potato was ready, I mushed it up with a whisk since I don't have a ricer,* then added the egg and flour and kneaded it briefly. I don't use the whisk in a beating motion, but like a more conventional potato masher, up-and-down. It's important not to handle the dough too much or the gluten in the flour binds with the starch of the potato and the pasta gets tough and gluey. With a conventional pasta you need to work the dough so the gluten develops, which helps the texture of the finished noodle, not so with gnocchi.

Another difference is that once the gnocchi pasta is formed, I like to cut it quickly and get the gnocchi into boiling water immediately so the gluten in the flour doesn't have time to get rubbery. With a conventional pasta, I'd rest the pasta before rolling to make the dough sturdier. Gnocchi are relatively big on the fork and in the mouth, so they need to be tender and light or they're a drag. I try to get through the process quickly, without using my hands too much**

I rolled the gnocchi pasta into little logs and cut it into lumps, then grooved them with a fork and plopped them in the water. They cook fairly quickly, but not as quick as cut pasta. Once they float, they need about another minute on the boil and they're done. Normally I just dump the pasta pot through a colander to collect the cooked pasta, but gnocchi are fragile enough (when made well) that I usually scoop them out with a wire basket. This also drains them well enough that I can toss them straight into the skillet for finishing.

After boiling, I like to toast gnocchi a little in olive oil or butter. They can be served like that with some herbs, parmigiano, black pepper and salt, or dressed with a sauce. We didn't have much to make a sauce with, but we had some V8 juice, which is pretty tasty, so I thought I'd give that a shot. I've used V8 instead of vegetable stock in other applications and it has proven versatile enough to make me take occasional excursions into the unknown like this.

Once the gnocchi were browned a little, I splashed a glug of V8 into the skillet and tossed the gnocchi, and in no time at all the V8 combined with the olive oil to make a nice thick emulsion that glazed the gnocchi as it intensified. I crushed some dried herbs on them before a final toss, then plated them and grated some Asiago on top. The saffron was a great idea, it made the gnocchi a bright yellow color and gave the body of the gnocchi a delicious whiff of the exotic, and the mineral overtone was balanced by the sweet-sour character of the apple. The glaze was tasty, but the acid in the V8 changed during cooking, leaving a slight chemical undertaste, and made me wish I'd just served these little yellow marvels on their own. I'm sure I could make a reduction of fresh juices that would work better, but I'll still endorse V8 for future experiments.

*My birthday is July 22
**That's what she said

Who Doesn't Like Brussels Sprouts

There's a persistent cultural perception that people don't like brussels sprouts, and I can't figure out where it came from. Everybody I know loves brussels sprouts. Whenever somebody brings out brussels sprouts, somebody is sure to exclaim, "I love brussels sprouts!" The only thing I can think of is that there are a few noisy assholes who don't like them and complain about them publicly, and through these outbursts they have the whole world convinced their opinion matters. They're the climate-change deniers of food. Sprouts are delicious. Only an asshole doesn't like brussels sprouts. Here are some sprouts served as contourno to a sausage ragu. The ragu was pretty standard, just some lumps of sausage and bacon cooked with shallot, garlic, apple, red pepper and tomato, then spooned over some polenta and garnished with grated parmigiano. The brussels sprouts were dressed with a vinaigrette of mustard, honey, garlic, sesame oil and sriracha on top of some big bib leaves of Italian basil. When I served it, Heather clapped her little hands together and said "Brussels sprouts! I love brussels sprouts."

Crazy Motherfucking Bitch

 Miss W pic credit.

There is no pleasing this woman.* She looks at you and observes potential unfulfilled, possibilities unattained. There's no way around it - she sees you as a compromise, a worthy non-profit cause goofy enough to love, not smart enough to admire. We muddle through, chatting up an acceptance storm, nibbling on settling-brand cheese, drinking best-I-can-get wine. Who cares, it's approximately where everyone else is at, right?

It's a downer scenario. There are plenty around like it; indeed, I've been in at least one affair like this. But I'd like to offer some optimism. There is hope if we recognize the following:

1. Love is waking up every morning wanting nothing more than to make the other person's day better.

The difference between dalliance and to-die-for is motivation. 






*Obviously I am not impugning the fetching Miss W, shown. She's a paragon of selflessness.

Bottoms Up, Upward Managers.

Superbowl Party Ideas

Alternate Title:  How to Cater a Party for 40

While this was going to be a post about how I catered the party my parents had over the holidays, it seems almost more appropriate to give you some good ideas about what to make next weekend for the big game.

Menu, courtesy of Dad

First, some tips on how to get it done:

• Figure out how many people are coming.
• Timing matters!  (or perhaps your inviation will dictate whether people expect a meal or snack)
• Are there any dietary restrictions/allergies?
• Plan a menu, taking care to pick mostly things that can be made ahead of time.
• Make lists your friend. Shopping lists, to-do lists...  better to have it written out than forget it.
• Accept help!  Whether it be another set of hands, a last-minute grocery run, or a dish you don't have time to focus on, welcome the opportunity to make your life a little easier.
• When it gets close to game time, don't worry about things that didn't quite get finished.  Chances are good that no one will know what is missing, it's more important to enjoy the party!

And now the Menu:

Bar Nuts
Snack Mix (Made by Mom)
Dips w/crudite: balsamic onion, hummus, eggplant caponata
Brie w/fig preserves and sliced almonds (baked at 350deg for ~30min)
Stuffed dates
Sausage Roll (Made by my Aunt)
Spinach & Gorgonzola roll (Made by my Aunt)
Bruschetta Apple Bruschetta
Chicken Satay w/Peanut Sauce
Herbed Turkey Meatballs w/Cranberry BBQ sauce (I made them smaller and kept them warm in the crockpot)
Kielbasa w/mustard
Herb Poached Shrimp w/Cocktail Sauce (recipe can also be found here)
Carrot Buttermilk Tart (I scaled up, but need to play around with proportions before I share my version)
Assorted cookies (from Mom, Aunt, and guests)
Pomegranate vanilla punch w/prosecco

Are you throwing or attending a Superbowl Party??  If so what will you be making?  Whatever you chose, don't forget to root for the Giants :)

The Dating Distribution Curve - Wombatgram #22

Click on Wombatgram to enlarge.

How to interpret the Dating Distribution Curve:

* Sequential date number shown on x-axis
* Total number of daters shown on y-axis
* Three peaks represent peaks of dating numbers
* Two troughs represent dips in dating numbers
* Successful negotiation of dips becomes progressively more difficult
* After date #10 you're beyond dating and onto some other status

Obviously, most people know by date #2 or #3 if there's a future with this person.

The dips exist to test whether you really should be together. Read more about The Dip here.



Other Wombatgrams here.

Bottoms  Up, Long Lasters.

Balsamic Onion Dip

A perfect addition to your Superbowl spread, this is a an onion dip with a little bit of character from balsamic vinegar.   If you have any leftover, I can see this as a wonderful spread on your sandwich as well!

Onion dip is on the left
(eggplant caponata in the middle, hummus on the right)

Balsamic Caramelized Onion Dip
adapted from my previous version
yield ~3c

2 1/4lb onions, cut in half and sliced into halfmoons
2T extra virgin olive oil
1/2c water
1/4c balsamic vinegar
1/4c cider vinegar
1t brown sugar
2c greek yogurt
8oz reduced fat cream cheese
salt and freshly ground black pepper

Heat the oil in a heavy, large pot over medium heat.  Add onions and cook, stirring occasionally, until onions have softened and become translucent.  Add water, vinegars and brown sugar and continue to cook on medium-low until onions are caramelized.  Set aside to cool.

In a medium bowl, combine the greek yogurt and cream cheese.  Beat until smooth and then stir in the caramelized onions.  Season, to taste, with salt and freshly ground pepper.  Cover and refrigerate for a few hours or up to two days.

Let stand at room temperature for a bit before serving with crudite.

Expecting the Unexpected

 Eliza Dushku

Meeting and dating someone in quick succession can be one of the funnest things in the universe. If you feel you have something with this new person the exhilaration of discovery is like a drug. Gimme more!

The downside of that is if it doesn't work out, you end up in a relationship with some sketchy dude who sells you low-grade shit at street-plus prices. Wait. That's another kind of drug, although the analogy holds pretty well.

We singles are all looking for that starburst of wonder and goodwill, elusive as it might be. There's no way to pre-figure the feeling, the chemistry follows no particular rules. Encounters with this drug are not restricted to singles either - I can think of at least three married women with whom I've shared that moment of singularity, of knowing. Fortunately, my better nature prevented anything more happening. There are quite a few what-ifs hanging out there in the universe.

Like any drug, mutual discovery is best enjoyed in the right environment. Bathrooms and cars are fun, but more appropriate when you're both on a slightly more solid footing. Passion can overwhelm common sense, so at least in the beginning some dating structure is good.

That's an old-fashioned view, I understand. Trouble is that heightened emotions - all I can think about is HER - leave no room for circumspection. It's all about wondering what she's doing, whether I need a haircut and how her pussy might taste.




Bottoms Up, Newly Acquainted.

POM Vanilla Punch

Unfortunately I don't have great pictures of this punch, but it was party time.  You can understand, right?  I made two batches of this and it was gone before the guests, so you don't have to take my word for it that this was delicious!!  Perfect for kids and adults alike, I served it with some bubbly on the side for those who wished to imbibe.

Pomegranate Vanilla Punch
adapted from How Sweet It Is
yield ~ 10-15 glasses

1 lg orange, sliced
1 lg apple, sliced
1 lg pear, sliced
airls of 1 large pomegranate
2 cinnamon stick
seeds and pod of 1 vanilla bean (optional)
1T vanilla extract
48oz pomegranate juice (not from concentrate, I used POM Wonderful)
1L vanilla seltzer
prosecco, optional

In a large pitcher, combine all ingredients except prosecco.  Cover and refrigerate for a few hours before serving.

Serve with prosecco on this side!

This one's a keeper folks!

Bacon Braised Chicken

Braising is a perfect one-pot, cold weather cooking technique that doesn't take much effort. The resulting meat is fall-off the bone tender. Adding fresh vegetables and herbs completes the dish.

As the braise simmers, the kitchen fills with a warming sweetness, further helping to banish the cold.

Using bacon with it's smoky flavor and good fat content adds even more flavor to the succulent chicken.

For Zesterdaily, I wrote a recipe for Bacon Braised Chicken that is perfect any time of the year, but especially on those cold and damp days when nothing gets you warm.

Who Gave Us Venison

I grew up eating game meat. My dad Frank Addison Albini was a terrific shot with a rifle and had generally excellent hunting skills. While my dad loved hunting and fishing, he didn't romanticize them. He was filling the freezer, not intellectualizing some caveman impulse or proving his worth as a real man. He spent considerable time working on the accuracy of his weapons and hand-loaded rounds for specific game and conditions, because he considered taking an animal with more than one shot needlessly cruel. Everyone he hunted with aspired to his ability.

In large part I owe my adventurous palate to my dad shooting so many different things. We regularly ate elk and venison, but we also had seasons where pop filled all the tags he could get, and he occasionally made excursions to Alaska, so in addition to all manner of fowl, I've eaten bear, antelope, wild boar, caribou and probably other big mammals I've forgotten. My mother handled this Noah's Ark larder with aplomb, happily using game in place of beef or pork in lasagna, ravioli, sausage and wherever else required.

I was reminded of this all when I discovered a parcel of Venison backstrap (loin) in our freezer. Somebody had obviously given it to us as a gift, probably from some fancy food place that sends things in dry ice and styrofoam, and I had put it in the freezer for later use. Sadly, I do not remember the giver, which implies that I failed to thank whoever it was, but perhaps this public humiliation will succeed in sharpening my social graces where everything else has failed. I defrosted a tidy little loin, which is called the backstrap when it's from a deer. I suppose if squirrel meat ever becomes commercial they'll come up with a name for it on a squirrel.

I love the rub Tim Midyette has developed for red meats, and lately I use it whenever I cook anything that walked on four legs. It's a simple dry mix of espresso, sumac, salt and pepper, and it works magic. I hadn't tried it on game meat, but the discovered venison gave me a perfect excuse. I rubbed it into the loin and let it rest while I prepared to sear it.

I only have one skillet, a simple steel line cook's item I bought at a restaurant supply shop 20 years ago. I also have an iron skillet, but it takes so long to heat up that I only use it when I have time to kill or need to make cornbread. Since I needed to make both the venison loin and a sauce for pasta to serve as a side dish, I had to stage the cooking and manage the skillet resource to serve everything at an appropriate temperature. The venison would need to rest after searing, so first I needed to put water on to boil, then sear the venison and let it rest, which would give me enough time to make a sauce for pasta. So I did that.

Venison like most game meats is exceptionally lean, and has to be served rare or it's tough and nasty. With a bigger cut, this can be difficult to judge, but with a little strip of loin like this, you basically just sear the margins and let it rest to come up to temperature. Takes a couple minutes.

The pasta sauce was pretty simple. I blanched white asparagus in the pasta water, then cut some of the asparagus and sauteed it with some leeks and red pepper in olive oil. When the sauce was almost ready, I dropped the capellini in the water. Capellini is a great pasta to serve with something like this because it's delicate enough not to compete with the vegetables and it cooks in a couple of minutes.

I tossed the pasta with the vegetables and plated it with a couple of the spears of asparagus, then sliced the loin and set it on top. I garnished it with some chopped scallions and mint, drizzled it with olive oil and shaved some asiago over everything. I thought it looked pretty good, but when I brought it to Heather her first words were "Why is there penises in my food?"*

She was referring to the asparagus. Because of the shape.**

*That's what she said no kidding.
**They look like penises.

Stuffed Dates

I like to call Medjool dates nature's candy.  Soft, caramel-y and delicious, I adore medjool dates.  So when I got an email from Laura Hartung asking if I wanted to attend a dinner at Form sponsored by Bard Valley I didn't hesitate to say yes.

I joined some fellow Boston bloggers including Janel, Elizabeth, Nancy and Liz at Forum restaurant for a four course dinner (with wine pairings) featuring medjool dates.  But it wasn't just about tasting-- we learned quite a bit as well!

Did you know that medjool dates are actually fresh?  I had assumed they were dried, but it turns out that's how they grow!  Chock full of fiber, potassium and polyphenols (antioxidants!), dates are a great way to add some healthy sweetness into your life :)

Our meal started with a Medjool date, orange and almond salad with goat cheese was quite delightful, and something I could see myself serving again and again.

Not a huge fan of duck, I was surprised by the main course, where a pan roasted duck breast was paired with black rice, broccoli rabe and a vanilla date puree.  I can see that vanilla date puree being used as the base of an ice cream...  :)

The last course of the evening left us all swooning- a Medjool date pudding cake with caramel infusion.  Holy moly, this was decadent and delicious.


We were lucky enough to be sent home with some leftovers and dates to enjoy.  And enjoy I did, creating this appetizer from my memory of the ones served at my favorite tapas restaurant!  I've served these two times in the past month and since I had people I didn't know telling me they loved me, I'm going to say they were a hit ;)  Want to make these vegetarian?  Try my friend Cara's version!

Stuffed Dates
Recipe by Shannon

If you're lucky enough to have an additional pair of hands helping you prepare these, it's quickly done in an assembly line-- one person can pit the dates another stuff.  Then both of you can work on the wrapping!

Medjool dates
Marcona almonds
goat cheese
proscuitto di parma (or serrano ham)

Preheat oven to 375deg.

Begin by pitting the dates, slicing lengthwise along half of the date and then removing the pit.

Once the dates are pitted, stuff an almond and 1-2t goat cheese (depends on the size of the date) and then close the date, bringing the two edges as close together as you can.  Set aside as you continue to stuff the remaining dates.

Cut each piece of proscuitto in half lengthwise and wrap each date in one half.  Place on a baking sheet and repeat with remaining dates.

Bake until dates are warmed and proscuitto is crispy, 10-12min.


I think these eclipsed my medjool-based running fuel as my favorite way to use dates :)  What's the most creative way you've used or eaten dates before?? 

Regrets, Imagination and Missed Connections

They first caught my eye years ago in The Stranger, Seattle's free leftie weekly, but I note that Craigslist has them too. "They" are the wee Missed Connections classifieds, posted by those poor souls who think they've spied someone special in public but botched the opportunity to introduce themselves.

This is representative:

You are a petite blonde hair, blue eyed woman with an amazing athletic build. Wow, you are so fit and attractive, I just can't take my eyes off of you.

Honestly, you're the highlight of my workout and the conclusion of my day. 
 
Note the slightly stalkerish POV and continued unwillingness to engage IRL.

This is more calculating:

You were at the Costco at _________ on Friday around 4:00PM . You had blue jeans tucked in your tall boots and you were with a bald older man. We exchanged multiple looks and smiles....me dark hair, light eyes, goatee, tall, handsome. I was smitten with you like no woman I have seen in years. Would love to show you the nicest of discreet times. No strings, no drama just fun excitement and passion. 

And this guy almost got it right:

We were chatting at Gin Mill, and I got your number but then i did not save it. You were a math teacher.

A tone of wistfulness inhabits these pieces. The unspoken question is "...what if..." which is clearly a product of imagination. The answer will remain in there too, unless these people DO SOMETHING about it, which is why I think this is so awesome. * snaps gum *

Check this out: MeSayingHi. SFW. The concept is simple. You store your online profile with the MeSayingHi folks. You buy introductory cards that allow access to that profile. When you have one of those potential missed opportunities, whip out the card, hand it to the person with as big smile as you can muster, and go about your day. (Then hope like hell they get back to you.)

I'm in favour of anything that eases the first awkward stranger-to-stranger encounter. Nothing will replace the actual act of walking up to someone, looking them in the eye and introducing yourself. But. Not everyone has that confidence. For those who do not, this will help.

Bravo Andrew at MeSayingHi, I'm a convert. *






Bottoms Up, Brave Knights and Knightettes.

*[BTW, in case you think I'm being paid for this: nope. I just think it's an excellent idea.]

Life's A Beach.

As a first date venue, the beach is a mixed bag. A walk along the beach as a part of a first date works well in my experience, mostly because the surrounds de-focus first-date nerves.

It needn't be a beach, of course. A park or even a stroll on a nice street will work in the same fashion, but the beach has a few advantages.

I like the beach because the palette is clear-cut. The colours are those of sea, sky and sand. The textures are air, land and water. And the sun might be shining, or not, and it's either windy or not. Elemental is probably the best way to describe being on the inside of one of nature's low-key highlights.

Think of it this way: On a first date, you are trying to find a way into your co-dater's head. You've already decided if you're physically attracted, and the permutations of how you imagine them fitting into your life have already played out. What remains is to figure out if the reality of this person can squeeze into your mental relationship-sardine-can.

Which is why a few subtle walk-along-the-beach qualities are important.

+ You both are likely to be barefoot. (Implied nakedness.)

+ You are not facing each other whilst walking. (Helps reduce the intensity.)

+ You're both breathing. (Great for clear thinking and positivity.)

 I wrote that beach dates are a mixed bag, so here's the downside. If you have a swim-date at the beach, you raise all kinds of questions regarding body-image and self-confidence. Unless you're galaxy-grade sure this isn't a problem for your date - OMG a first date, gulp! - settle for a walk. If that works, there's plenty of time for bikinis later.



Bottoms Up, Bikini Bottoms.

Butternut Farrotto

Farro has quickly become my favorite whole grain.  No doubt it was only a matter of time before I threw it into a risotto.  Paired with butternut squash and sage (a few more of my favorite things), this dish should be on your menu next week!

Butternut Farrotto
Recipe by Shannon
Serves 2-4

2c 1/2" peeled butternut squash cubes
2-3T extra virgin olive oil, divided
1/2c chopped onion
1 clove garlic, minced/pressed
2T chopped sage, divided
3/4c farro
1 1/4c broth (or more water)
1 1/2c water
1-2oz gruyere, finely grated

Preheat oven to 400deg.

Toss butternut squash cubes with 1-2T olive oil, some coarse sea salt and a few grinds of black pepper.  Spread out on a baking sheet and roast in preheated oven until tender, ~20-30min, stirring after 15min.

While squash is roasting, begin cooking the farro.  Heat 1T olive oil in a medium pot over medium heat.  Add onion and cook until softened but not brown, 5-8min.  Add garlic and 1T sage and cook until fragrant, 1-2min.  Add farro, stir to coat and toast the grains for a few minutes.

Add broth and water, stir and bring to a simmer.  Reduce heat to low and continue to simmer, stirring often, until the farro is tender, 20-25min.  Once the farro is tender, stir in roasted squash, remaining sage and grated gruyere.  Taste and adjust seasonings, then serve topped with crispy sage if desired.

Are you on the farro bandwagon yet?  :)

May I Have This Dance?

 Pic credit.

I prefer earlier composers - the Baroque suits me better. But in Salzburg, Mozart's home town, they have a wonderful tradition of re-enacting all things Mozartish. His music is everywhere and so is the sensibility. People dress as they did in the late eighteenth century and dance to the music of the time. It's wonderful to see.

The dancing's where I'm getting to. Mozart wrote a lot of dance music, and was no mean dancer himself. He wrote for the popular styles of the time, meaning popular with the kind of people who held and attended balls, not street riff-raff. He was passionate about writing and participating, especially the minuet.

There was nothing stuffy about the music:

They are exasperating to listen to in large quantity, but they are full of lively, even zany details, and serve as a reminder that eighteenth-century composers were expected to be adept at producing both 'popular' and 'serious' music, and that there was no categorical difference between the two.

The vision in my head is of a ballroom of finely dressed Austrians. People of all ages are in attendance, good dancers and bad, friends and strangers. There's chatter and laughter between dances, smiles and storytelling, like at any good party.

The music begins, and men and women partner up - sometimes wives and husbands, sometimes friends, oftentimes singles. Steps and moves are formalized and everyone knows the rules, although not everyone can keep time. The fun, as with all good dancing, lies in the shared grace and closeness. The movements are contrived and formulated, but that is the point. Anyone can dance with anyone else precisely because the rules are clear and understood.

One other surviving period detail is that men always ask for the woman to join him in a dance. That seems to work best.







Bottoms Up Salzburgers.

Cardamom Orange Cookies

The past few years, I've taken to sending some homemade goodies to friends whom I don't get to see all that often.  This cookie was a surprising mention from a couple of people, so I knew I'd be remiss not to post the recipe for you!  These are perfect with a cup of chai tea :)

Cardamom Orange Cookies
adapted from Gourmet
yeild:  5-6 dozen

These cookies can be done in stages, the dough can be refrigerated for up to 5 days before baking, or even frozen for up to 1 month (just thaw in the refrigerator before baking).

3c white whole wheat flour
1t baking powder
3/4t kosher salt
3t ground cardamom
1/2t ground cinnamon
1/4t ground ginger
zest of 1/2-1 orange
2 sticks of unsalted butter, RT
1c evaporated cane juice (or granulated sugar)
2 lg eggs
1t vanilla extract
sprinkles, if desired

In a large bowl, whisk together dry ingredients (flour through zest).

Cream together butter and sugar until light and fluffy, preferably in a stand mixer.  Add eggs and vanilla, then beat until well combined.  Reduce speed to low and add in flour mixture until just combined.

Divide dough in half and place on separate sheets of plastic wrap.  Using a spatula and the plastic, form into logs (squares or rectangles, whatever is easiest!).  Place on a baking sheet or large plate and refrigerate for an hour or overnight.

Make sure your oven racks are in the upper and lower thirds of the oven so you can bake two sheets of cookies at a time, then preheat the oven to 350deg.

Add sprinkles to a shallow bowl, a little at a time.  Using a serrated knife, cut ~1/4" slices from one log and roll the edges in the sprinkles.  Place, 1" apart on 2 large, ungreased baking sheets.  Wrap the remaining log and place back in the refrigerator.  Bake cookies 10-12min, switching the position in the oven halfway through, until edges are golden and the cookies are set.  Cool on the baking sheets for ~3min, then transfer to cooling racks.  Repeat with the remaining dough.

Store in an airtight container.

What was your favorite holiday treat this year?

Relationship Mash-Upship

Sophie Marceau pic credit.

Beautifully matched couples are boring. Kens and Barbies together are meant to be seen as a pair, batteries sold separately. Surely they have their tiffs and differences like any other be-coupled life forms, but it's less dramatic when you know there'll always be someone else. The drama of a bust-up barely registers when the danger is only of when they'll find another one just like the last. Answer: It won't take long.

Couples who are clearly different in appearance raise interesting questions. Do they know they look mismatched? What is it they have in common? Which one of them has the most devious motivation? Are they together out of spite? Which of them is desperate?

[You'll note that I attribute less than honourable motives here. That speaks to my mind, not to our theoretical odd pair.]

In my experience, there are a few broad categories where couples look noticeable. There's the big age difference, the big looks- or body-style difference, and the style difference. A style difference would be, say, someone fully tatted-up with a cleanskin. Cheatin' Jesse James and Sandra Bullock is one example. Less obvious mismatches are those involving social ability, wealth and intelligence. Intelligence is a tricky one, because measurement is so subjective.

Looking around, it's clear that we tend to meld with those who more-or-less look like they belong to us. That might simply be because all we want in a partner is the opposite-sex version of our favourite person. Us.






Bottoms Up, Self-Esteemers.

Being In The Moment, Until the End.

Morgane Slemp pic credit.

Is dating an extended job interview or an end unto itself? If it's an interview, what is the job? And if dating's the thing, why is it so fraught?

~/\~

In my experience, whenever people talk about their dating lives, there's a whisper of unfulfillment in the air. They drift off into an unspoken wistfulness, eg:


Oh, we're dating. Nothing serious... or

Yep, been dating a year or so now....

It's never (apart from initially)

OMG! I love it! We're dating!*

~/\~

Mismatched intentions doom many budding romances. It's the question everyone loathes, viz:

Where are we going with this?

If either dater feels the need to ask this question, it's over. If he or she doesn't communicate clearly some kind of goal that's vaguely related to yours, without prompting, asking the question merely emphasizes likely relationship termination.

~/\~

It's possible that I, like many others, am brainwashed into thinking that dating is only ever a road to somewhere else. Dating as its own reward can work, but requires the kind of communication rarely seen when people first meet and want to make matters more formal.

Kate, I want to spend more time with you, to date you. However, at this point I have no interest nor plans beyond that. All good with you?

Or

Doug, just date me. That's all I want.

~/\~

* Granted, beyond a certain age, this might be the case.

Bottoms Up, Existentialists.

Butternut Apple Bruschetta

I'm posting this recipe today to prepare you for your next party, as this recipe is not to be missed.  First at the cookie swap, and then at another holiday party, these bruschetta got rave reviews and are nothing short of fantastic!

Action shot!  Thanks Cara :)

Butternut Apple Bruschetta
inspired by Joanne & Jen
Serves a crowd

I didn't count how many bruschetta I made, but I'm guessing I could've gotten ~3dozen from this recipe.  The butternut squash and apples can be roasted ahead of time, just bring them to room temperature before assembly.

1 lg butternut squash
1 lg, crisp apple (or 2 small, I used honeycrisp)
extra virgin olive oil
sea salt (I used coarse for roasting and fine for seasoning the ricotta)
freshly ground black pepper
1 15oz tub fresh ricotta cheese
cranberry bread (the Savory Cranberry loaf I used the first time was stellar, but cranberry walnut also worked well)
fresh sage
reduced balsamic vinegar

Preheat the oven to 375deg.

Cut the butternut squash and apples into similar sized cubes, I went for ~1/2" dice.  Add cubed squash and apples to a large bowl and toss with 1-2T olive oil, some coarse sea salt and a few grinds of black pepper.  Spread out on a cookie sheet and bake for 20-30min, tossing halfway.  Set aside to cool.

Melt a small slab of butter in a skillet (probably ~1T) over medium-low heat.  Add fresh sage leaves (a handful?  I just made sure they were in a single layer in the skillet) and cook until beginning to brown, ~2-3min/side.  Once crispy, transfer sage leaves to a plate lined with paper towels and drain until ready to assemble crostini.

Slice bread into thin slices, then into smaller, easy to hold pieces.  The cranberry bread I used was bigger than a traditional baguette, so I cut each slice into 3 pieces.  Lay out in a single layer on a cookie sheet and lightly drizzle with olive oil.  Sprinkle with a little coarse sea salt and then bake, a few minutes on each side until they are beginning to brown and are crispy.

While the bread cools, finish preparing the remaining components.  Add a bit of salt and a good dose of freshly ground black pepper to the ricotta and mix well (do this right in the container, no need to dirty another bowl!).  Crumble the crispy sage into a small bowl.  To prepare the balsamic vinegar to top the crostini, add 1/4c balsamic vinegar to a small saucepan and heat over medium heat until it has reduced by about half.

To prepare the bruschetta, top each crostini with a heaping tablespoon of ricotta and a spoonful of roasted squash and apples.  Repeat with remaining crostini and add to a serving dish.  Once they're all done, sprinkle the crispy sage over the bruschetta and drizzle on the balsamic vinegar.

What was the best appetizer you had this past holiday season?

Tell Him He's Dreaming

 Zarah Pacheco pic credit.

I do it all the time - I get stuck in my head, thinking about meeting the perfect gal, how it would all be so neat and clean and happy ever after. Living like this courts trouble, especially when we're talking the sex and so on, because the mind doesn't own a watch. Time has no meaning in daydream fantasy land, so that when a real life prospect comes along in actual real life, time actually applies and I crash to earth.

Time's important because there's really no fast-forwarding through the getting-to-know-you period. We're not like automobiles; there's no plugging in a computer to check the status and history of all the machine's systems, as fun as it is to imagine doing that with a person.

Okay, Bud, whattawe got here? Alrighty, looks like her history's pretty clean. Body's straight. Transmission's been replaced, looks like it was a warranty job, so that's good. Fluids all clean and changed regularly. Tyres are getting close to the limit, but will do for now. She needs to go for a long ride, I'd say she only does short trips around town, so she needs a good blow-out. Apart from that, I'd say you've got a solid prospect here. 

Wouldn't it be neat to know precisely what you're in for when you meet someone? Of course, there'd be no discovery, but really, revelation's over-rated. History's chock-full of dead explorers.

But back to this planet. We're all PDG at masking stuff we think needs hiding - but not forever. Some kind of universal consensus hovers around the eighteen month mark as about the period required to uncover your sweetie's suitability. That's about the time Magellan took to get half-way around the world.

Just for the record, he died there.



Bottoms Up, Relationship Mechanics.

Sweet Potatoes & Red Lentils

Happy New Year!!

I can't quite believe it's already 2012, but hopefully you had a wonderful holiday season and are ready to get this year started right ;)  If you didn't catch my 11 Best of '11, there are some goodies in there!

While there are quite a few things I have to tell you about, I chose something a bit healthier to start off with, in case you're still in a cookie coma!  This dip morphed into a delicious soup, so you could certainly go whichever route you're craving.  Is it 50 in december?  Perhaps you'll prefer some crisp veggies and dip.  If it actually feels like winter where you are, I'd opt for a nice bowl of this delicious soup!

Sweet Potato & Red Lentil Dip
adapted from Whole Foods
Yield:  4c

1-2T extra virgin olive oil
1 sm onion, chopped
1 lg garlic clove, chopped
2 sm sweet potatoes, cut into 1/2" cubes
1" knob of ginger, grated
1t cumin
1/2t curry powder
1/2t smoked paprika
1/2t garam masala
1/4t coriander
1/2t sea salt
few grinds black pepper
1 1/2c red lentils, picked over
3/4c light coconut milk
2 1/2c water
juice of 1 sm lemon

Heat oil in a large saucepan over medium-high heat.  Add onion and saute, stirring occasionally until softened, ~5-7min.   Add sweet potatoes and spices (ginger through pepper) and saute until fragrant. Stir in lentils, water and coconut milk and bring to a boil.  Reduce heat, cover and simmer until the sweet potatoes (and lentils) are soft, ~20min.  If your liquid cooks off before the sweet potatoes are tender, add a little more  water (but not too much, or that will make for a thin dip).

Remove the pan from the heat and let cool a bit.  Add lemon juice to the mixture and puree using a blender or food processor.  Taste and adjust seasonings.

Serve with a drizzle of olive oil or chopped herbs, if you remember ;)

Sweet Potato & Red Lentil Soup

leftover sweet potato and red lentil dip (recipe above)
remaining coconut milk from the can
water/broth, if desired

Add dip and coconut milk to a saucepan and heat over medium-low heat.  Stir or whisk to combine and add any water to reach your desired consistency.  Serve warm, topped with chopped scallions or herbs, or some greek yogurt.


How did you ring in the new year?

Necking, Making Out and Just the Right Seasoning

Alena Seredova pic credit.

What ever happened to making out? I wonder if people still sit together on a couch or in the car and fool around with their clothes on, or whether we're all so sophisticated thesedays we go straight for the bonking.

Good make-out is more than just kissing, because kissing by itself is like food without seasoning. The salt and pepper of a smooch session are the little things, like some nibbling, a little hair-pulling, deep eye contact and so on. A skilled make-out artist knows the value of piano and forte, of innocence and raunch, and of fast and slow.

As any professional lady will tell you, kissing is more sensual and personal than mere fucking, which confirms my thinking - that we communicate more with a long kissing session than in a straightforward shag. Okay, maybe not, but it's certainly more subtle than all the reproductive stuff. Let's face it, all shagging is variations of thrusting and grinding, but kissing is infinitely more nuanced.

At least half of the make-out experience is smell and feel. The smell of a woman is an enormous turn-on, something that we all know but seem to think pertains only to her juicy parts. I, for instance, love the smell and feel of a woman's neck. The right neck - attached to the right woman - is a thing of beauty. Necks have heavenly curves that no mathematical formula can describe, and if they're touched in the right way, moaning results.

I like it when women moan and I'm pretty sure they do too.




Bottoms Up Make-Out Bandits.