The Boner Gap

An awkward few seconds lurk in the space between knowing she's ready and crossing the moat. The preparatory work is done, according to the following checklist:

A. Girl nearby.

B. Aroused girl nearby.

C. At least partially naked girl nearby.

(Note: These first three points might be the same girl, or three, YMMV.)

D. Boner. (Your own.)

E. Condom.



Okay, now to connect your erect penis with the willing pussy. Time to bust out the condom.

Quickly now, the clock's running.

Another checklist:

A. Locate condom.

B. Tear open condom packet.

C. Retrieve that sucker from the packet.

D. Make sure you avoid the inside-out error.

E. Roll condom on penis.

F. Fully unfurl said prophylactic.

G. Insert properly outfitted manhood into luscious love trench.



What's the timing on that? Should we say between ten and thirty seconds?

We need a name for that gap. My suggestions include:

The Boner Gap.

The Keep it Up Interregnum.

Don't Let me Down, Dude, Gap.

Say Flaccid and I'll Kill You Gap.

The Why Hasn't Condom Packaging Improved in 100 Years Gap.

The How Bad Would a Baby Be Anyway? Gap.






Bottoms Up, Condomistas!


Pic of pigtailed aweseomeness from here [link]

Hat-tip to Snaf for the inspiration.

Marry an older woman

According to the BBC*:

The proportion of brides in England and Wales marrying a younger man rose from 15% to 26% in the years from 1963 to 1998, it said.

The percentage of women marrying a man at least six years younger more than doubled in that time, from 3% to 7%.

The report concluded people were now marrying less for social status and more to fulfil "individual goals".

That's clear enough. In 35 years the proportion of Cougars successfully bagging a younger guy increased by 133%. Good for them. My question revolves around 'individual goals'. What individual goal is met by marrying a younger - or even much younger - man?

I have an idea. Individual goals include:

~ wanting a harder-bodied man than those in her age-group.

~ wanting a more malleable man than those in her age-group.

~ wanting a trophy.

~ wanting to show her virility (or should that be fertility?)

~ wanting someone to look after her in old age.

Remarkable. These reasons look to be exactly the same ones that attract men to younger women, with one exception.


Cougars Part One, Cougars Part Three, Cougars Part Four.


*The statistical study is here.