It's a Girl - My Lord! - In a Flatbed Ford

Now I don't want to draw too much from this, but do the lyrics of this Eagles song make you a little nostalgic?

The dude's running away - possibly doing the fadeout - on seven women;

Well, I'm running down the road
Tryin' to loosen my load
I've got seven women on my mind
Four that wanna own me
Two that wanna stone me
One says she's a friend of mine

With one aim in mind,  he's;

Lookin' for a lover
Who won't blow my cover
She's so hard to find...

Which is where we meet the girl in Winslow driving the flatbed Ford. The way she can save him is to seize the moment for some uncommitted random fucking.

Come on, baby
Don't say maybe
I gotta know if your sweet love
Is gonna save me

We may lose and we may win
Though we will never be here again
So open up, I'm climbin' in
And take it easy

Subtle use of the "climbin' in" metaphor.

It's reflective of a misguided instinct: the way to leave one (or seven) women is to take up with someone fresh - close all the doors of the past by opening a new one. Yeah, that never works.

The vanity here is telling, although I'm sneakily smiling at the complete absence of any sexual political posturing. This tune represents the apogee of the Californian/hippy/baby-boom/free love/whatever feels good/just do it age perfectly, as well as (arguably) the apogee of money-making from having a good time.

Lucky bastards.



Bottoms Up, and do whatever feels good.



Take It Easy lyrics © Jackson Browne/Swallow Turn Music/Night Kitchen Music/Open Window Music.

The Dating Horizon - Wombatgram #24

The triumph of imagination over reality leads to all sorts of dissatisfaction and grumpiness. Best to figure out what's likely, what's possible, and what that one-night stand will actually lead to.

For greater clarity, click on Wombatgram. 


Previous efforts. 



Bottoms Up, Simplificators.

Wedding Night Sex

 Photo hat-tip: Miss Licious.

Somewhere, in blogland or a trashy newspaper, I read that fewer than fifty percent of couples have sex on their wedding night. That seems about right. Conventional weddings are awful, stressful things, non-conducive to relaxed (or even frenzied) lovemaking. Emotional and physical exhaustion ruin desire.

But let's say you've practised abstinence. It's your wedding night, and high time for a thorough seeing-too. For God knows how long you've both restricted yourselves, and now your rules allow for...well, anything, I guess. Where do you start?

 Where would you start? It must be like being locked overnight in your favourite store, able to take anything you want. Presumably masturbation is allowed if you're pre-maritally abstinent towards your beloved, so holding back the reservoir wouldn't be too overwhelming. I guess the whole point is having penis in vagina, so the quickest way to make that happen would be the first order of business.

I wonder how many folks are disappointed at that first time? Wouldn't that be a sinking feeling, discovering that after all that delayed gratification, you'd hitched yourself to a dud bash?

Still, it must be quite a moment, that first time, outcome notwithstanding.



Miss Miz's favourite link. SFW

Bottoms Up, Newlyweds.

Here's how to find your wedding-day limousine.

The First Sex

FIAT hottie photo credit.

I didn't quite find my point with this post; Stop/Start. How about a fresh start - from the beginning maestro.

Tap tap.

When the time comes for the the first shag, it's best to keep everything pretty simple. In my experience, that is. You horny sexual gymnast kink-monsters with libidos like mountain ranges and parts that never stop can get away with anything. This is your regular, slightly mystified male talking here.

Notwithstanding any prior conversations or imaginings, there is no way to know what she's like when the carnal beast within is released.

:-> She might say she gives the best head in the world, but what's the standard by which we measure that?

:-> Quite possibly she's open to anything you might ask, but how smart is it to ask for sex over a barstool on the very first shot?

:-> She talks a big game about wanting it all the time - alright, let's get a hotel room for a week and check it out.

No. The wise man who is about to dip his wick for the first time shows control by reigning in his outlier predelictions. He captures the black swan and discreetly deposits it in the henhouse for a while. One step at a time, Junior Wombat. The Bonk Bus is best enjoyed as a long ride up the mountain, not a scamper to the top and a BASE jump.


Bottoms Up, Gradual Learners.