The Long and Short of Strap-On Dildos

I'm in two minds about fishing. On the one hand there is the grouper sandwich and macadamia encrusted mahi-mahi. Mmmmm....mahi-mahi. On the other hand there are hooks and nets.



How is the salmon served again?



Fishermen are divided into two species - recreational anglers, that is. There are live-bait fishermen and artificial-bait fishermen. It's not a trivial difference. These are Old Testament/New Testament kind of arguments, unsolved by beer or beer-battered catfish. But let us not tarry. My fishy musings aren't for nothing, dear friends. There are sex aids afoot and what wonders lie before us!



Behold, the strap-on dildo. This piece of priapic pulchritude fills a gap - so to speak - when a penis is missing. One imagines that most owners are lesbians, but no doubt there's a big market for women who want to show their menfolk what it's like to have six or more inches of extruded polymer shoved up their butt.



Which isn't where I'd like to focus. What's interesting to me is that Mr P is always invited to the party, whether the participants like penis or not. Lesbians, are, presumably, those most likely to purchase a strap-on...which must pain them no end. Interesting that those with only sapphic attractions still like an ersatz bloke about the place; one held in place with buckles and straps.



Let's review: When a dick's not to hand, there are always artificial dicks, even if you don't like dick or the person to whom he's attached. Bravo, marital aid industry and UPS. You've done us proud. Even those of us who use live bait.









Bottoms Up, Naturists.

Friday Fluffer - Freedom of Speech

Pussy Power might work on heterosexual men, but the 'tween legs dynamo does not influence the majesty of the law.

Jennifer LaPenta wore her I Have the Pussy, So I Make the Rules tee in the gallery during her friend's court hearing. The Judge was not amused - and Jennifer was cited for contempt.

She left the court in cuffs with a 48 hour sentence to serve. Unfortunately for Jen, this was not an elaborate submission game, and the man who led her away was not taking her to his dungeon for some fun.

The Smoking Gun has the story and the pics. [link]



Bottoms Up, New Inmates!

Friday Fluffer - Who's a lesbian now then?

Like anyone cares, but Meredith Baxter* (pictured) has found the confines of her closet somewhat restrictive, and exited with a new title: lesbian. Yay her. I mention this only because of the article in which I read this news, which quoted an academic person thusly:

While evidence is anecdotal, "the consensus in the field is that these late-life transitions are more common for women than men," said Lisa Diamond, a professor of psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah. Her book, "Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire," posits that women's sexual feelings are more complicated than straight or gay, and may change over a lifetime. [link]

It reminded me of some other research in which I personally participated:

While evidence is anecdotal, "the consensus in the field is that Wombat attracts more women after he's had a glass or two of red wine," said a source. "It's more common for women to realize they want to bed a burrowing marsupial once his tongue's loosened by alcohol." The source, a graduate student of Wombat Studies, said "Marsupials are complicated. It's not as easy as you might think, what with the nocturnality and so on. The women often change their minds in the morning."

Or this, sent to me by a friend:

While evidence is anecdotal, "the consensus in the field is that girl-on-girl action is more likely to occur when money changes hands," said Maria Sappho, an associate professor. Her thesis is entitled 'Hookers and Poon: why guys have to pay professionals to live out their fantasies.' "Threesomes involving one man and two women are more complicated than pornographic movies suggest," Maria said. "Cash probably works, unless one of the girls has a credit card reader. The guy often feels regret when he checks his credit card statement."





Quote of the day: Gardening experts Mary Henry and Margaret Purcell like to joke that "we slept together for years before we realized we were lesbians."

*Meredith.[link]

Pic of Meredith direct from her agent. And pretty much everywhere on the internet when you search her.