Getting to Yes

 Cavemen are unfairly maligned. For all we know our pre-historic brothers were deft and sensitive sex partners, their women loved, respected and thoroughly satisfied. Without smartphones, online gaming and recreational drugs, Caveman Colin probably paid more attention to Cavegirl Caitlin than we imagine. Let's face it, sex is about the most fun activity to be had when you and the g/f have no money, no place to go and three days to spare.

Of course our cartoonish view of Colin and Caitlin is that he forced himself upon her, with club in hand and ill intent in mind. Rape, in other words. It's our own arrogance that concocts this stuff because there is no evidence either way. That's why we call it pre-history. I'm positing a different slant, that's all.

However, it does raise a point. The aim of all men interested in sex is more-or-less one thing, and it's not the sex itself - assent is what we look for. Getting to "Yes!" - exclamation point and all - is the universal and lifelong challenge that pretty much all men have in common. Once a woman gives the all clear, the sex will take care of itself. Starting the Sex Snowball (R) rolling is actually our goal, even if recognizing this truth occurs not to the average bloke.

Again, we're kinda blinded by modern media stereotypes (drink advertisements, pharmaceutical salesmen, bloggers) into assessing womanhood by sexuality, rather than her availability...to us, the individual. Pursuit of someone whose interest is marginal can be decent sport, but is mostly frustrating. Much better to be clear about exactly what you're trying to do, and indeed whether the odds are on your side. First, agreement; then sex. That's the way it works.

Note here that when she says "Yes", or "I thought you'd never ask", or "Just DO ME" it's a time-limited permission slip. Each session of sex requires a fresh accord, even in the most heated sexual relationship.  In marriage, too, we must always ensure our lady is on board with giving herself to the sexual muse. Conjugal rights are only an acknowledgment that a standing request is part of the relationship, they're not an Unconditional Surrender.




Bottoms Up, Quest for Yes Compatriots.